reviewing anita's demos

whats that smell -

i can't even hear it. it sounds interesting. what little i can hear. but it needs to be much louder
- make it louder
- since it sint loud ca't hear the words youre saying

la da da da da da5

right off the bat i like what im haering. like youve got a clear guitar part that sounds awesome. and then the vocals are cool. it sounds very 80s, until you start singing. and then the vocal w/ the guitar sounds twee together. like fragile etc. like antsy pants etc. this is an awesome song.

this is good:
1- cause its catchy
2- your voice sounds awesome
3- the feel is really deep / good

what could make it better
1- play it live @ an open mic
2- maybe record it @ a studio
3- and to do those maybe practice it more
3- and to do that maybe write out lyrics

although around 2:47 it starts to get boring. maybe you need something new to keep it interesting because otherwise it just kinda... well its kinda boring to my ears. maybe you could add something there to change it up a bit and that'll help maintain interested

so problems
1- around 2:47 it gets boring, and almost gives you a headache to listen to, because its not really giving the listener enough to kinda listen to.

from 2:47 to 4:01

idea2

this's just vocals at first. kinda doesn't really turn into anything, so it's not really a song, more like an intro to one. kinda like an ... atmospheric thing hwich is a huge insult to any musician as you want to be front and center.

just got off the bus

spoken word / sung. this ones kinda soft. but its interesting. it kinda sucks since there's no music. and hte recording is so soft that the hiss is louder than the words

so criticism
#1 - there's no music
#2 - the vocals are recorded very soft
#3 - 'cause o #2, hiss is loud and makes voice hard to hear

but...
these are basically just stopping me from hearing the performance better. so figure out maybe a way to record your stuff so that the details get saved better.

his birthday's today

this's a good one, really alot of structure, and definately has alot of potential. you've got alot there to work with, and it can totally be built up into a full-band song. there's one thing i don't like that you do with your voice but you onlydo it once, but so far @ 1:08 its mostly good. hah i like the part where you go "but its way past noon". 1:27 starting to get boring, because the music isn't like... varied enough. i think your stuff needs more varied music behind it. but i think thats mainly due to the mandolin being kinda like, repeated and not having as much thought put into it as the vocals. i think this song needs more varied backing music to meet the complexity of the lyrics. 2:14 - im gonna make it for him, kinda cool. and then ... kinda drifts in and out at parts but i think you need like... a more in depth music part. but i think this is one of your best ones.

strong points:
- catchy, and for the first min or so the mando + vox do it justice
- has potential, can be made into a band song, and put onto an album / sung live

weak points:
- gets boring after awhile @ like the 2nd minute
-

Bye Bye
is awesome. i'd say that's track #3. but you could definately see the need for like backing music i'd say. i mean im not a fan of just sung vox w/o music unless its got enough depth to it, so like, either pour yourself more int othe vox, to make it standalone, or add an instrument to make it complimented and something thats fun to listen to, with a beat, and a groove. that'd give someone a chance to dance to it. but like, around 1:55, it gets boring again, like, you seem to like, lose steam around there. and it just feels like you lose all energy in your song by that point. i think if you sang this with more heart for longer, that the song might just generally soundbetter. when it sounds like youd ont even want to sing it then it makes it sound shitty. because thats how people efel when they listen to it.

hear that clicking1
way too slow for me first off. i feel like the chords have alot of potential. like i could turn this into a band song easy because of htat minor chord specifically that you start with, very poppy,a nd that means i immediately have drum / guitar / bass ideas, and maybe even backing vocals. so in that sense, this is a very good candidate for perhaps me to modify. but i can already see @ 1:47 that its 7:56 long, and it might be... boring halfway through especially if im guessing right you'll use the same chrod progression the whole way. one important thing w/ stuff is you have to change things around enough to keep peoples attention. actually, this keeps my attention even @ 2:35, and it seems like there you start playing double the speed on the keyboard, and im not really liking the direction you took with the music, but of course, your vocals, theyre just fine, like the decisions you make w/ your vocals are good ones, but the music decisions, well, theyre goo,d and @ 3:14 you start doing an extra bass on the keyboard, which makes it sound like a bit emo but also a little bit like a disney song, but its cool. you have good natural impulses, like you know its cool to make parts sound dramatic, some parts sound soft, etc, but its like, i think maybe youd ont have the skill yet in the instruments to pull them off as well as you want, 4:06 so youve kept my interest, but i think after the first listen there might not be enough to drive me to listen through teh whole way. im not sure. this might be an exception, where your lyrics are really compelling me to listen to it. i think thats the thing you have to consider, whats compelling people to lsiten to whatyou're doing. 4:54 i think you've kinda run out of steam here. like, its still going, but it feels like youre milking the chord progression for all it has. and now youre not even singing words, but more woah woahs, and wah ah ah ah, and ooo's, so those're cool, but i think the keyboard repeated progression kills your song alot, because it just keeps repeating. it's at 5:50 now and its still not changed the progression. this is the major weakness in your stuff. you don't do any changes of chords. yous tick to the same progression the whole way through. and when you do it for 7:56, its just too much. honestly i think around the 1:30 point you've kinda milked it out for all it can do, like now at the 6:34 mark im just almost getting irritated still listening to the same chords over and over. you have to give the listener changes so that they have constantly fresh things to listen to so theyre pleased. this song kinda just abuses your listeners, and they have to put up with the repeated chords to lsiten to your words, which are good. so once you hear the words, i think there might not be much reason to listen to this again. the reason being that the repeated chords for now its been over 7:32 just torture the listener.

test1
so far its just keyboard. which is ok. its a nice small part, which i think with guitar + bass + vocals it could sound cool. but alone its just an idea. but i guess thats why you called it test. its not like a complete song in my mind.

love me
so far only lyrics. no mandolin, no keyboard. no rhythm. now spoken word / sung word accapella appeals to some people, but you have to remember that its like a niche thing, and unless you sing a well known song or that sort, its hard for an audience to pay attention. with that said, i know this song has alot of potential. so its like, a half finished idea i'd say, but you still need alot more before this is ready to be recorded in the studio. i could easily come up with those parts that are not yet written, if you want. but thats basically where you generally say no and just keep your ideas hidden and unused. just saying.

and we march4
sounds kinda repetative, and doesnt help that basically those two higher notes hurt my ears hah. and its just keyboard, no vocals, so this isnt a song so much as it is an idea. but at 00:58 you do a walkdown and something interesting. keep walking down. its interesting. so now it almost becomes a song. like at 1:14 youre now doing something interesting here as well. but then at 1:23 you seem to change your idea. but then at 1:30 its something new again and its cool, although the last is minor not major which kinda makes you wince a bit. then at 1:49 you do a walkdown that sounds kinda cool. and then a scale at 1:59 which sounds cool. and then at 2:11 you come up with a sick bass part. and repeat it. so i think this might be my favorite jam of you on the keyboard of what you've given me. 2:35 still sounds good, with the break you do. this to me is an example of some of your better instrument work.

little birdie
the words arent bad, but you kinda leave it to the listener to kinda fill in the blanks without any music. but, given that its short, it comes across as charming, and not oppressive. although even at the 00:46 point, it seems a bit dragging. but it comes across as a nursery rhyme. kinda interesting. but in the end not one of my favorites of your stuff on this cd.

keys2
so immediately im a bit worried because its 8 minutes. but the intro is interesting for sure, although im scared youre going to repeat the whole thing for 8 minutes. dude, youre even yawning when you play it. take that as a sign, if it bores you, then it'll probably bore me. at 1:02 your voice takes more interest to it, like youve got the ability to sing in a way that kinda keeps people interested. ithiknmaybe youve got skills in your voice that you havent yet learned to control. but when you do 'em theyre cool. 1:45 - im so tired wont you come by me, that was an idea. but i feel like im listening to a jam session. which kinda turns me off. like i feel like you didnt put work into this to make it sound good, you just recorded something quick and gave it to me, without trying to make it sound good.

take a breath of fresh air 2
another vocals only song. like ive said alot, your vocals are fine, but without music backing it its just kidna weird to listen to. although ill say so far 30 seconds in youve got it pitch perfect so that makes this stand out. but still youve gotta realize that if you want people to just listen to your voice then youve gotta enunciate, like i cant understand half of the words youer singing. thats accomplishable by just taking the time to try and like, properly pronounce every letter and stuff. hard T's, S's, C's, etc.

ponies in my locket rehearsal8me

this sounds cool. there's mandolin + lyrics. and the chords actually change, which is even better. so im liking this already alot more than alot of your other stuff. and the vocals are varied in how you sing them. 00:58. starts to get old. like it needs to be more varied, or maybe just needs to be sung with energy. because otherwise you strum it in a way that just sounds kinda annoying. i think this is generally one of yoru problems, halfway through the song the energy dies and it kinda loses interest. but i think the thing is that halfway through its kinda like wow, this is a cool song, but halfway through you realize, oh, thats it? and then you have to sit through a repetition. like i would like it alot more if we had alot to look forward to even when the song was halfway done. its good to repeat, and your repeats keep it interesting until about the 50 second mark for some, 1:30 for others. but youve gotta kinda maybe tackel the problem of how things can seem a bit boring after that because its just repeating the chord progression.

we're so sad 4
vocals, i think youre like copying a gospel singer almost. im not sure if thats your real voice, but youve got so many, im not sure whichs your voice you actually like to use. like when you say sad, you pronounce it weirdly. and then there's like no... guitar stuff, or mandolin stuff backing it. but then i guess because of the way that you sing it, it kinda gets itneresting. but again like 1:09 you lose it by doing the hoo hoo hoo's, and it just kinda loses the feeling. i wonder if its that you just fall apart after the halfway point. youre confident the first half and then youre not so much when you start the 2nd half.

and we march3
immediately i like the drum + keyboard combo, it's my style. but the vocals arent quite what i'd do. lets see what you do with this. im not really liking this. like the da- dadada- dadada- dadadadadada is just super repeated. i guess i hate super repeated stuff. and the keyboard doesnt really - "as we march @ 1:11 " to the sea. thats awesome. yes we march. come with me. this is all good. and we march. to the sea. this is really awesome. when you get right to it. yes we march. come with me. e-e-e-e, come with me. march with me. by my side. come with me. - so basically the lessons from that is dont just start a song with oo's, you need ot hook people with something, and you did, with as we march, but you did oo'sbefore, and those were just boring. i think you did some good things here. of course the instrumental part after, seems too long. like you shoulda gone back to as we march again. and now it seems like infinate repeat of your keyboard part...

little brother -
singing, no mandolin, no keyboard. again, not a hge fan of soft sung vocals with hiss louder than your voice. main problem is you cant hear what youre doing. but its just annoying to listen to as well, as the hiss hurts your ears. and then also how like, there's no mandolin, no keyboard, its just not as varied as some of your other stuff. its really simple i'd say. and i guess once you've listened to your complicated stuff, its hard to listen to the simple stuff. and then again at the 1:10 mark, haflway point, you seem to in your voice take on this feeling of fear, and tension, growing, which kinda spoils the recording.

ideathing 3
the intro rocks of course. 00:11 still cool. 00:18 still cool. 00:21 still cool. :0026. 00:30 kinda getting boring. 00:33, boring now. 00:39 boring... its cool but you do it too long. certain things can only be done so long, as they're gimmicky and flashy, but little substance. so with those gimmicky flashy things, use sparingly.

the father of my own
another vocal thing. it almost sounds likeit cuol dbe sung celtically. but there's emotion, agani, the vocals are recorded so softly that you can hardly hear anything. i hate pure vocal recordings without music.

let me hear your voice
keyboard, organlike, 00:17, kinda boring. -0:22 you do it again, starting with la's, and stuff. no real words yet at 00:37. same chords. this is just horrible. 00:51. no words yet. chords getting cooler though. 1:02 really boring as you use that one chord so much. 1:10 really boring, and still no words. i can't listen to this

fucking came out of nowhere1
another vox only song...

idea3
another hoo hoo hoo thing without words... use the hoos and la's after you've built a song. hook them with a good word. and then you speak but the recording was done so softly nothing comes up. record yourself better. fix that, so that i can actually hear you.

wicker frames
another vox w/o music.

keys1
30 minutes... way too long. keep your ideas to like, 1:30, or so. to keep interesting. and if they are good, then we can stretch them out.